Why You Should Do the Opposite of Normal
This is one of my favourite times of the year. The start of the school season and the changing of the colors have always signified another “new beginning”, not unlike January 1st or the first warm weekend of the summer.
No matter what your goals, I encourage you to look at this as a new chance to start again or to increase your focus on transforming your business, increasing your income, or improving your health.
As you’ll learn from the character in my essay today, there is no better time to action than now.
Time to do something,
Craig Ballantyne
Do the OppositeThis weekend as I rode the train from the big city to my house in the country I went through some brainstorming homework for one of my coaching groups.
As I worked through the exercises, I realized what I needed to do in order to take my business to the next level.
But it wasn’t what I wanted to do. In fact, it was the exact opposite. The situation reminded me of one of my favorite TV shows. And so today’s lesson comes from a strange man, George Costanza, the legendary character from, “Seinfeld”.
If you’re not a TV watcher, here’s what you need to know:
George Costanza was Jerry Seinfeld’s loser sidekick, for whom nothing ever worked out.
Finally, in one season, things finally start going right for George, all because he starts acting in the complete opposite way of his instincts.
Perhaps you remember this scene where George thinks he might get a job with the New York Yankees…
George: “A job with the New York Yankees! This has been the dream of my life ever since I was a child, and it’s all happening because I’m completely ignoring every urge towards common sense and good judgment I’ve ever had…
…something is happening in my life! I did this opposite thing last night. Up was down! Black was white! Good was…
Jerry: …bad
George: Day was…
Elaine: …night
George: Yeah!
Now before you go and hunt for the rest of that episode on Hulu or Itunes, let me explain what it means to us. At one point in this episode, George says,
“It all became very clear to me sitting out there today, that every decision I’ve ever made in my entire life has been wrong. My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be.”
Now I know that doesn’t describe you, but it might describe your experiences with trying to build a business.
If the businesses you’ve tried to start are not everything you want them to be, then maybe you need to start acting opposite to your instincts and common sense.
For example, one of my online business friends is struggling with getting things done, but he doesn’t want to give up control and delegate.So what’s the solution?
There is only one – Do the opposite of what he wants to do.
He MUST – absolutely must – give up his control obsession and delegate lower skill tasks or else he will drown in opportunity.
Another one of my friends – who now runs a successful online fitness business – once told me he hated sitting behind a computer, but he wanted to have his own website selling fitness information products.
Guess what he had to do in order to succeed?
It was only when he “pulled a Costanza” and forced himself to sit down in front of his computer to write that his business took off. Today his website gets almost five thousands visitors each day and he has almost a dozen products for his rabid fans.
Then there’s me.
I’d love nothing more than to sit behind my computer and write all day long. I’ve made good progress with that system.
But if I want to spread my mission – to really, truly impact ALL of the people I want to help with my 1 Million Transformation Mission in the fitness industry – then I too must be like George and do the opposite of my instincts.
That means more live events, speaking, product launches, and days dedicated to filming videos. I don’t love any of those as much as I do writing, but if I want to succeed, I have to do the opposite of what I want and get out of my comfort zone.
It is tempting for us – myself included – to remain in our comfort zones, but that is not where we grow, improve, and make the necessary changes to dramatically move ahead.
My challenge to you today, and this week, is to pull a Costanza and do the opposite.
Look at what you are doing to stay in your comfort zone and think, “What is the opposite action of my instinct? And would this opposite action be the better solution?”
After all, it worked for George.
“Yes, I will do the opposite. I used to sit here and do nothing, and regret it for the rest of the day, so now I will do the opposite, and I will do something!” – George Costanza
Sounds like a plan.
Lessons come from the funniest places,
Craig Ballantyne
“I’m back in business, baby!” – George Costanza
Power of Pushing BackBy Jason Leister
Growing up, I was never the type of kid to get into trouble. In fact, I was conditioned pretty well to, at the first sign of conflict, pull away and concede.
In real life, behavior like that will lead to struggle.
But in school, that's a pretty sure path to being labelled a "good kid." You're gentle, not much trouble, and easy to control.
My number one skill in high school was the ability to follow the rules.
You have to follow the rules if you want to be a 4.0 student like I did. If you think, talk and take tests like "they" expect you too, the road is pretty smooth. But why was that so important to me in high school? I have no idea.
How's that for unconscious living?
4 years of schooling... a GPA that was off the charts and I have no reason for performing at that level other than it was fairly easy... and I was aiming to please.
By the grace of God, I've woken up over the years and have become just a wee bit more independent in thought and action.
I'm happy to say that pleasing people has taken quite a drop on my list of priorities.
So what does this have to do with working with clients?
The Power of Pushing Back
When your client says something like, "We need X and X done for $X... oh and it needs to be finished by next Thursday..." how do you respond?
When they ask you things like, "Why should we work with you over any of our other choices..." how do you respond to that?
Or when they say something like, "Well John gave us a quote that was 50% less than yours. You're going to have to do better than that..." How about that one? What would you say then?
The old Jason from high school would have answered those questions like this:
Those answers are pretty darn weak if I must say so.
- Yes, sir coming sir, right away sir.
- Well, I'm a very nice person and I'll make sure you're happy.
- That's no problem. I can do this project for the same price John can.
The new Jason would answer these questions just a bit differently:
A little better wouldn't you say? I would. This is the power of pushing back. This is the power of actually showing up in a client negotiation. This is the power of understanding that conflict is not bad. Conflict is a clue, that's it. Conflict is an opportunity, not something to be avoided.
- I don't do rush jobs. And I'm not cheap. The reason why is because I'm far more concerned with quality and results than I am with just getting it done. If you're just looking for fast or cheap, then you have a lot of choices. Plenty of people can do that. If you want it done right (the first time), and you're willing to invest in that level of quality, then maybe we should talk.
- I'm not sure that you should be working with me. What makes you think that I can help you reach this goal?
- I'm happy to reduce my fee, but not without removing some of the value. Which parts of this project would you like me to remove?
When you're dealing with clients, always push back. Life is one big negotiation. It's a constant flow of give and take. Working with clients doesn't mean you go in, lay down and get steamrolled.
Just because they have the money doesn't mean they are in control. The only time they are in control is when you let them be in control.
This is your business, not theirs. So if you're unhappy with your current business in some way, it's not your clients' fault. The responsibility sits squarely on your shoulders.
Accept that responsibility, and you will soon understand that THAT is the secret to success
Be sure to check out the Pain Relief World Summit starting in October!
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